"You don't even want to contemplate where I'm going to stick this unless you give me a piggyback ride..."

I think the pressure’s starting to get to them.  After spending the day fending off mind control, genocide, girl on girl action, little squeaky white things and an angry midget in a fish tank, the crew of the Liberator go a bit bonkers; listening to a stolen radio, catching amnesia (all of them) and stealing from an – understandably – angry motorcycle courier who seems to have lost his bike.

They’re just a bunch of hooligans really.

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Domestic disputes are so inconvenient aren’t they? One minute your bicycle-powered nuclear reactor is causing a power cut and keeping your next-door neighbours awake (well, the ones you haven’t got tied up in the kitchen) and the next thing you know you’re being investigated by the government, soldiers have cordoned off your street and your neighbours have released a virulent, communicable monkey plague into your living room.

Hasn’t anyone heard of community spirit?

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What a pair!

The local schoolteacher finds them to be a right handful, the God-fearing puritans struggle to get to grips with first one then the other….even the vampire on the hill can’t wait to start sucking on them.

Honestly, they just can’t contain themselves.  Careful handling is advised.

What? Yes, I know she’s got a sister. They’re twins.

What did you think I was talking about?

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Seriously, I'm not sure which is scarier. Look at the eyes, I tell you, THE EYES!

Welcome back everyone and Happy New Year! We’ve entered a new decade, with a new Doctor – and in colour! Watch this clip but be warned, Mike’s been at the song lyrics again…

Think of all the monsters that you’ve ever heard about
like Sea Devil, Krynoid, Rutan and Slitheen
There are lots of weird monsters in the universe
But have you ever seen an Auton that is green?
Seen!
An Auton that is positively green,
Well that’s because there aren’t any,
there really aren’t any,
An Auton isn’t ecologically sound
They’re not bio-degradable,
They’re made of plastic, with no voice, they’re just a massive tool!
They’ll kill us all – ‘cos they’re Autons
They’re bloodthirsty Autons
They want to wipe out our race,
Because they’re silent, violent, take a long time to melt
Plastic (and drastic) from feet to faaaaaaaaaaaace.
(bom ba dom bom bom dom)

I did warn you…

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See you in fortnight, when we meet Twins of Evil!

So you’re planning to conquer the galaxy? Do you have a big villainous beard, treacherous subordinates with slightly smaller villainous beards, nameless minions with pvc uniforms and weird guns? Do you have an air of menacing authority; a bold, inventive, never been done before plan involving fog, mud, designer glasses and pop art wallpaper?

If the answer to all these is a big YES! Then you’re ready to begin. Just make sure that you stop off on the way and get yourself an arch nemesis and your own personal fanfare every time you walk into a room.

I think it’s fair to say that this is a fairly momentous occasion for both Doctor Who (the end of the Sixties, the end of the black and white era, the last Patrick Troughton story) and TimeVault (a journey started back in May 2007, we too have regenerated at least once, staying the same but… different). There have been trying times along the way for the Doctor and for us – but also lots of fun and laughter. Mike and I shall miss the Second Doctor. Nothing in life is perfect, of course, but the sublime Patrick Troughton comes very, very close…

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We’ll see you on January the 13th 2012 when the Doctor begins his exile. Until then, thanks very much for listening, have an amazing Christmas and a wonderful New Year!

First up is the complete third episode of the William Hartnell story Galaxy 4 (Air Lock, September 1965). Prior to this only a short segment from the first episode remained in the archive with no telesnaps taken to show how the third episode and its characters would have looked.

Also, the complete second episode of Patrick Troughton’s third story The Underwater Menace (January 1967) has also been recovered – making this the earliest complete episode for the Second Doctor to now exist in the BBC Archives (alongside the existing episode three).

Both episodes were shown yesterday afternoon at the British Film Institute‘s Missing Believed Wiped event – the first time they’ve been seen in the United Kingdom since their original transmission.

The episodes will obviously require restoration work before they can be commercially released, with film damage to be repaired and missing censored clips to be re-instated. An announcement will be made by 2|Entertain next year as to when they are likely to appear on DVD. Meanwhile, the previous existing material for both stories can be found on the Lost in Time DVD boxed set.

These are the first full episodes to have been recovered since the 1965 Daleks’ Master Plan episode Day of Armageddon turned up back in 2004, and brings the total missing episodes tally to 106. For more information on Doctor Who‘s Missing Episodes, I urge you to read the excellent Wiped! by Richard Molesworth.

I think it’s fair to say that neither of these episodes were on any fans “must-have” list, both coming form stories with deservedly poor reputations, however their recovery achieves several things:

Peter Purves, as companion Steven Taylor, is poorly represented in the Archives and any opportunity to see him in action is very welcome. As William Hartnell’s health continued to decline, like William Russell before him, Purves was required to step up and anchor episodes where the series’ official leading man just couldn’t cope. Even with just the soundtracks available, it’s clear he had quite a job on his hands and doesn’t get enough praise for some incredible work.

Derek Martinus was one of the more acclaimed directors of Doctor Who in the Sixties and of the 28 episodes he directed half of them are missing, so it will be interesting to see if his talented direction can lift a story that, on audio, is terribly dull.

The Underwater Menace, based on the reputation of what we can see of Part 3 and what we can hear of the rest, is not well loved. A combination of pantomime overacting, a limp plot, and that bloody fish-people ballet put this story firmly towards the bottom of most fans “favourite story” lists (we all have them, don’t deny it). But… this is Patrick Troughton’s third story, and his Doctor’s character was still being established. Nobody had ever replaced the lead actor on a popular show by playing a completely different version of the same man. It was unique and risky and still had to prove itself. Twelve episodes in and the series is clearly still in “Experimental Mode”. I won’t be surprising anyone by saying that it doesn’t work but it will still be fascinating to see how it pairs up with Part 3 and if our feelings towards it mellow with a little more to see. Plus, as with Peter Purves, we get some more Ben and Polly action – which will always get a thumbs up in my book.

Most importantly though, this find re-establishes hope for finding more “lost” episodes. It’s still highly unlikely we’ll get everything back but, given that the collector who had these thought the BBC already had them, how many more are sitting in people’s garages, sheds or lofts awaiting discovery?

Okay, you’ll never be able to look down without falling over and fridge magnets will suddenly become a nuisance but that’s not many downsides.

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A professional cat impressionist with an outdated sense of dress, a medically recognised allergy to sunlight and a desperate need for some dental work is unfairly victimised by a bunch of squatters who’ve quite clearly mistaken his stately home for the Three Bears hut (they sit in his chairs, eat his food and sleep in his beds).

It’s not a fairy tale though because, after barging into the poor man’s home and helping themselves to all his stuff, they creep into his bedroom to do who knows what, and he’s forced to defend himself. And when the Vatican’s militant pensioner wing side with the squatters, it just gets nasty.

Victimisation by the church of lonely, disabled social outcasts and English tourists behaving like common criminals… Honestly, what is the world coming to? He only wanted a girlfriend.  Or two.

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